Guangzhou Stuff

Limericks – bottom of the barrel poetry but a great way to practice English and have a bit of fun at the same time. The stanza (format) is quite simple and I have given a few examples to kick things off.

So why not flex your poetic muscles and have a bash? Simply choose a member on this site and write him/her an ode.

I have selected 3 GZ Stuffers who we all know and love and who I am sure can take a spot of leg pulling. They have also been fairly prominent of late.

"Fuck, fuck, shit, hate, fuck!" is her call
Her ranting can cause quite a squall
Siting Chen is her name, and this is her claim
"I hate the whole World, fuck you all"

There was a (Re?)Publican, Sean
Who one day was feeling forlorn
In a bit of a huff, he quit GZ Stuff
And his groupies did cry, wail and mourn ……until he came back 5 minutes later.

Gareth a man from the Shire
Who as 'Tree' lit a huge forest fire
Said the Sherwood Oak, "this isn't a joke
I'm a poet and not a damn liar …. honest squire".

*Apparently Gareth and Tree are not the same. I would like to take this opportunity to issue a public apology for being a finger pointing shit stirrer….. and for being wrong.

Luckily for me, Rob doesn't rhyme with anything, except maybe nob, gob, slob, snob, flob and a few others.

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As you wish..........

A giant young Aussie named Ida,
Begged Len the gruff ogre to ride her,
"But look at my chopper, it's an absolute whopper,
Can't you open your crack any wider?"
Poor Jason - a GZ Stuff geek,
Was concerned by his tiny physique,
But it's not size that counts, when riding your mounts,
What's essential is skillful technique.

........ am I right?
An explorer they call Ian Shaw,
Is in fact just a 2 dollar whore,
He peddles his hole, from Equator to Pole,
Till his ring piece is tender and sore.

......... where are you?
I've had to drop my rate to $1.98 - it's a recession don'tcha know.
There once was man from Hong Kong
Obsessed with his own little dong
Despite his best tries
And claims about size
He struck out with the girls of Guangdong
To me Gzstuff ranks as one of the best creations
With membership like a mini United Nations
Although some tend to hog this site
With trivial stuff and trite
But its still a great site for all generations.
This picture of you playing the guitar
Gives the impression you're a musical star
But at rhyming you truly suck
Oh, hell what the fuck
You may have stayed too long in the bar.

You ask if I am Italian or Greek
My identity you do wish to seek
For those of you in the know
My name should bring amusement galore
I'm neither, I truly speak.
Annie was in Bound 7 days ago,
Witnessed a cat fight so she went loco,
She spread the news in gzstuff the next day,
Made some people curious and some in worry,
Hahaha to you fearless girl, I shout Bravo!
I'm a GSI agent, Gzstuff Scene Investigation..


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